On My Way Home – Day 160

November 8, 2010 No Comments


365 Days to a Balanced Life Journey – Day160


Quote of the Day

“Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to do what they want to do.” – Kathleen Winsor

Here I am checking my emails at the Air New Zealand Lounge in Auckland waiting to start my return to my “real life”, when I read the above quote.  It resonated with me because that is exactly how I felt in Australia.  In the beginning I was stressing a bit about making sure I got all the things done that I had intended to do while on this Solitude Journey.  I went with a detailed Daily To Do List (I did not read it the entire time I was gone, but I kept thinking about it).  Somewhere into the second week I realized that this is not what I’m supposed to be doing.  All my life I have been on a schedule with obligations and goals to achieve.  Then it hit me!  When would I ever have this “guilt free” opportunity again?  Why was I not just taking this unbelievable gift of time to do exactly what I wanted to do Every   Single   Day?  So that is what I did and an amazing thing happened to me.  My mind slowed down.  Without meditation!

At first I felt a little odd.  I found myself going through the days in a bit of a haze.  Like how you feel when you’ve had a little too much alcohol or prescription relaxants (don’t read anything into that, I am describing the RARE occasions that I would have felt that way).  Really. :)

Everything just started flowing for me.  Even the frustrating times when things would go wrong, as they are apt to do when travelling, didn’t really affect me.  I just calmly assessed the situation and came up with a solution.  I was able to ignore people who were unpleasant (I used to think it was my purpose in life to inform them how unpleasant they were).  I really started living each moment for what it was, good or bad (very few bad by the way).

Mostly I just loved the way I drifted through my days.  It is not like I sat like a lump and ate myself through Australia.  I worked out almost every day.  I read some very interesting books.  I made sure I ate properly (as best as I could in restaurants), I got plenty of rest and I took time to reflect on my life.  Every night I went to sleep feeling satisfied with my day and looking forward to the next day.  There were days I did do absolutely nothing and I enjoyed those most of all.  There were at least 4 days on the trip that I was in bed by 6pm.

My husband and I had decided not to speak on the phone the entire time I was gone.  Instead we would email each other a Good Morning and a Good Night every day.  I suggested to him during the third week that we write each other a Love Letter to be sent two days prior to us meeting in Los Angeles.  Anticipating each other’s letter was wonderful but the really amazing part was writing it.  We both took many days to think about it before we started writing and it took us both about 4 days to complete our 5-7 page masterpieces (you guessed it, mine was 7). 

We had guidelines such as; When did you first know it was love?  What do you love about the other person?  What do you respect about the other person?  What needs to change in the relationship? What do you need to forgive the other person for?  What do you need to forgive yourself for?  I can tell you that writing this letter had tremendous impact on me.  I cried during the writing of it and I still cry when I read it (I’m tearing up as I write this for God’s sake!).  I got way more out of writing my letter then I did receiving Jack’s letter, although his letter was beautiful and touching.  When you write this kind of letter you really have to examine your life together and your participation in it.  I believe this time apart has made us realize that as good as our life is together it can be so much more.

I am going home rested, relaxed, very calm and extremely positive about the changes that I think I can bring to my everyday life and I know my husband feels the same way.  However, before I go home to my “real life”, Jack and I are having a romantic week in LA together.  I don’t think I’ll be posting for awhile. :)


Leave a Reply